Love

The Other Side of the Sour Date Night

In a previous blog we shared about the date night that went sour…here’s the flip side of the story:

“It’s been a long time since my wife and I have gone out. She hasn’t gotten dressed up and put on makeup for me in a long time. Not that that’s important, she’s beautiful without it, it’s just nice to have that extra special little something. I know she feels better when she puts on the makeup and gets dressed up, too; I notice a little extra pep in her step. I’m really looking forward to going out on the town with her tonight,” he thinks as he smiles to himself and settles into the couch to watch some football.

“She usually takes a while to get ready, so I’ll just watch some football and when she’s done, she can have a nice glass of wine and relax while I get cleaned up real fast. I don’t take nearly as long as she does.”

A little while later his wife comes out into the living room all dolled up and ready to go, first with a smile and within nanoseconds, her smile turns into a frown and she’s yelling at him.

Help, I Feel Like I'm 5 Again!

If you’ve been in a romantic relationship for any length of time you are probably familiar with the feeling of shifting from being lovey-dovey with your partner to thinking he or she is completely out to get you—and that shift can sometimes happen in a split second.  

If you’ve ever had this experience, you’re not alone.  

Almost everyone who has ever been in a romantic relationship has experienced this at some point in their relationship. When it happens, it’s usually related to the some issue you’ve had before:
Your partner didn’t put the cup in the sink, again!
Your partner left their socks in the middle of the room, again!
Your partner didn’t take the trash out to the street, again!
Your partner was out with their friends all night long, again!
Your partner’s mother invited herself over without letting you know, again!

If your relationships feel strained, this might be why

If your relationships feel strained, difficult, or leave you feeling less than pleased, this video might offer you some answers.

Watch the video on this blog to learn how your relationships are really mirrors for you and what that even means...

What is Loneliness?

Many of the clients who reach out to us for either individual therapy or couples counseling here at our San Jose psychotherapy office do so because they feel lonely in their lives and their relationships, despite being surrounded by loved ones.  

In our Get Acquainted Calls women seeking therapy share with us they have an intimate romantic partnership, yet for whatever reason, they feel lonely and disconnected. They describe a sense of feeling like their lives are on auto-pilot and the love and connection they once used to experience in their marriage or partnership feels like it is missing. These women crave the feeling of connection and intimacy they once shared with their partners.

What is Wholeness?

When you lose touch with your wholeness, you fall out of harmony with yourself, and you experience a feeling of brokenness, of incompletion, and physical and mental dis-eases as a result.

The process of becoming whole again is all about finding all of your lost (or exiled, shunned, excluded) parts and pieces, and getting to know them. Once you are able to hear their stories, hear what they have to say, they can then be healed and re-integrated into yourself, helping you return back to your wholeness, filling up your holes from the inside out.

Falling in Love with ALL of You

Falling in Love with ALL of You

Why is falling in love so difficult? It's because you don't know who you are.

It is when you start to get to know your parts, all your inner little children, and show them the love and attention they want, that they begin to heal, thus helping you come back into wholeness and revealing the true you, the balanced you, the aligned you. The you that is perfect, whole and complete.

Loving Yourself Means Knowing Yourself

How intimately do we really know ourselves? We spend so much time avoiding things about ourselves that we never truly take the time to get to know ourselves. Read more on how loving yourself is a process of getting to know yourself. 

Disarming the Voices

Disarming the Voices

We all have voices in our head. The voices of our stories, the things we tell ourselves which we believe to be true. These stories we carry around with us make up the worlds that we live in.

“You’re too fat.”
“You’re too skinny.”
“You’re not pretty.”
“You’re useless.”
“You have nothing to offer.”
“You’re not worthy of love and affection.”
“You deserve to die miserable and alone.”

Venus Retrograde: A Real Life Example of its Impact

Venus Retrograde: A Real Life Example of its Impact

Here's a look at a real life example of how sneaky this Venus retrograde period we are in can be and how crazy making it can become for us if we don't look for the deeper lesson. 

The Message Inside Out Has for Us

The Message Inside Out Has for Us

Although the character in the movie is an 11 year old girl, the same principle applies to all of us:

We can be happy, healthy adults, loving our jobs, and having great success in all areas of our lives, but then something happens, perhaps our 3rd boyfriend in a row breaks up with us, and we can spiral down into the depths of despair that lead us to believe we are not good enough, not worthy enough, that there is something inherently wrong with us, and we turn to behaviors such as shopping, eating, drinking, or having random sex with people to help us manage the unmanageable feelings.