The stories we tell ourselves. Lies. All lies. Until we find our stories and heal them. Until we see where they come from and hear them. Until we hear them with love and compassion and kindness. Until we can welcome them with an open heart. And once we do that, more accurate and true stories can emerge. Until then, they are all lies.
The theme of the process of unbecoming in order to become has been on my mind for a few months now, and this blog is finally ready to be written as I too have been moving through clearing a number of the old lies I've told myself, as I too have been moving through the process of unbecoming in order to become.
In the process of becoming we have to unbecome. In the process of becoming who we are truly meant to be we have to face every single lie we've ever told ourselves, and facing these lies is how we unbecome. We unbecome all of the things our false stories led us to believe. We unbecome all the costumes we took on, all of the roles we played.
When we unbecome we take off our masks, we cast them all aside, and as we do so, the fear of letting go feels as if we might die. So part of unbecoming is also to let ourselves come undone. It is to allow ourselves to die. We die multiple times, every time a lie is unbecome, a part of us dies. We then experience the grief, the grief of the process of unbecoming to become.
This process can feel incredibly painful, and most people would do anything in order to avoid this pain--even if that means not allowing the process of unbecoming to help and allow them to become undone. For some people, the pain of unbecoming is so great, they would rather say in the pain of the despair they do know, because the devil you know is better than the devil you don't... It's in the familiarity of the pain they have come to know so well over the course of their lives.
What we forget is the pain of unbecoming and coming undone is temporary. It doesn't last forever. It might hurt like a bitch at first, just like when we put alcohol or hydrogen peroxide on an infected wound we've gotten so used to living with. And yet, the burn and the sting doesn't last as long as the infection that has been festering.
Through the lies we told ourselves and the evidence we've gathered to support our lies, it is as though we've pieced ourselves together like a ragged patchwork teddy bear. Different fabrics, all sloppily piecemealed together, in an attempt to keep us together, to hold us together, as we attempt to make sense of the lies we've told ourselves (or been told).
What we don't realize and recognize is: underneath all of the patchwork (which, is beautiful in and of itself if you can see the beauty in the ways it served you) is a being who is bright and brilliant and shining strong.
Underneath all of that patchwork is a brilliance and a beauty that is perfect whole and complete in its Divine perfection and glory. Underneath all of that patchwork is the you that you are meant to be.
It can feel scary to start taking off the fabric, one piece at a time, as every lie you've ever told yourself or believed about yourself comes undone, because you might feel naked, vulnerable, and exposed. It might seem counterintuitive, and it is quite the paradox, and yet, what is important to remember is, it is in your vulnerability and your authenticity in which your safety lies.
You cannot keep yourself safe behind walls or behind patchwork piecemealed together. That is where you keep yourself locked off, blocked off, and close off to the Truth of who you are. You keep yourself safe when you allow yourself to be who you truly are.
"It is in your vulnerability and your authenticity in which your safety lies."
If you are ready to welcome support on your journey of unbecoming to become who you are truly meant to be, click here to schedule your free initial consultation. We're here for you.