You're Beautiful Just the Way You Are

For months now ever since the song came out, Alessia Cara's "Scars to Your Beautiful" has resonated deeply with me and I've been wanting to write about it. It's gotten quite rare these days that we actually hear songs on the radio which share a beautiful message with us. Most songs are about drugs, sex, and all sorts of toxic codependency (like the song Tove Lo sung about "Habits" in which she's talking drugs, sex, and codependency! I wrote about it here). It's rare that we hear a song about the inner light and inner beauty that lives within us all.

The song starts with, "She just wants to be beautiful, she goes unnoticed, she knows no limits, she craves attention, she praises an image." The woman the song is about doesn't realize how beautiful she is, that her beauty lives within her, so, she feels unnoticed and craves attention. She doesn't believe she is perfect, whole, and complete as she is, so she praises an image.

The song then goes on to say, "she don't see the light that's shining, deeper than the eyes can find it, maybe we have made her blind." Here I feel we are getting perspective about how our culture plays a huge role in how people, especially women, have forgotten their own beauty. We are constantly bombarded with marketing which tells us we aren't enough and we need x, y or z in order to feel better, look better, be better. Cara asks us to ponder if perhaps "we have made her blind" to the light that shines within her.

Next up, "she tries to cover up her pain, and cut her woes away, 'cause covergirls don't cry, after their face is made." This is one of the most powerful parts of the song. Here Cara shares the one thing we as a society have been taught to do with our pain: cover it up, cut it away, throw it away, and pretend it doesn't exist.

It doesn't matter at this point if you are a man or a woman, the experience is the same. If you are a woman, you are told, "put a smile on your face and move on." If you are a man, you are told, "suck it up and be a man." With messages such as those, how can we allow ourselves to be true to who we are? How can we feel safe to feel and express what is really happening in our internal worlds? How can we connect our insides and our outsides?

We can't.

So, we don't.

We instead cut ourselves off, creating fragmented pieces of ourselves. We then move through our lives wondering what is missing within us...And we turn to external sources to try and fill us up. This leads us to experience much more sadness, emptiness, and loneliness in our lives.

Then we get to one of my favorite parts of the song, the chorus. The part where Cara reminds us, "there's a hope that's waiting for you in the dark, you should know you're beautiful just the way you are, and you don't have to change a thing, the world could change its heart, no scars to your beautiful, we're stars and we're beautiful." She brings us back to the reminder of our own inherent beauty and wisdom that each and every one of us has within us. She reminds us of where our true beauty lies: inside ourselves.

Next up, my absolute favorite part of the song, she says, "she don't see her perfect, she don't understand she's worth it, or that beauty goes deeper than the surface...so to all the girls that's hurting, let me be your mirror, help you see a little bit clearer, the light that shines within." Here she gives us hope. She reminds us the girl in the song is perfect, worth it, and her beauty goes deeper than the surface. Cara then lets us know, for all the girls that are hurting, she will be your mirror, she will help you see a little bit clearer. So often in life we need those mirrors in our lives to help reflect us back to our light when we forget our light is there, living within us, waiting for us to see it again.

Have you ever walked down the street and saw someone who was simply radiant? The woman who has a glow that radiates from deep within her? The woman who walks with confidence secure with who she is from the inside out? The woman whose external reality and success matches her internal state of being? Wouldn't it be nice to feel like her?

If you are ready to live your life from that place of pure radiance and joy and inner beauty, schedule your free initial consultation to speak with us today.

And, thank you Alessia Cara for bringing your beautiful light to the world through this beautiful (and much needed) song!